The Phantom of the Space Ship
by Saiyan Princess Psycho Pan
Chibi Trunks- Christine
Vegeta- The Phantom
Pan- Gohans Wife
Gohan- Pans Husband
Chorus Girls- Yamcha, Goku, Bulma, Piccolo, Dende, Frieza, Guru, Nail, Captain Ginyu, and Master Roshi
Auctioneer- Tifa Lockheart
:: A large crowd is gathered in front of an old stage. Tifa Lockheart, as of FF7, walks up on the stage. A microphone is situated beside some old stuff.::
::She stand in front of the microphone.::
Tifa: Uh, two months ago, this old opera house- `La Saiyan` Ma `Bouque- was discovered under the remains of some old building
::She glances at her script that she wrote on her hand.::
Tifa: A la Pone Affilates and here we have some old items that we are auctioning off.
Buu: (Out in the audience) Stop talking and start auctioning!
Tifa: Whatever. Here we have
::She stops and stares at the item.::
Tifa: An old music box with a monkey on it !?
::She rolls her eyes.::
Tifa: Well, the starting amount is ten bucks.
Tifa: Sir, please stay within the price range and-
::Chaozu starts waving a bottle of beer in the air and pouring it on himself.::
Tifa: Good God, sir!
::She throws the music box at him.::
Tifa: Hmph! Well, next, we have a chandelier that was in pieces, that was put together for us by Pan.
::The audience starts clapping, and a really old and sick looking Pan stands up and falls over trying to bow. Tifa glances at her script again.::
Tifa: Which brings back memories of the famous Phantom of the Space Ship" incident
::She turns on the chandelier. A really weird song starts up, and the scene changes to #17, the Chorus girls, Tien, and Chaozu all standing in a new looking Opera House. When the song ends, #17 starts singing in a weird soprano voice.::
#17: Think of meeeeeeeeeeee,
Think of me fooooooooondly when weve said goooooooodbye
Kuririren: Youre horrible now, #17!
#18: Kuririren! Can you dance?
Kuririren: Uh, yeah.
::He starts waltzing around the stage with Piccolo. He throws Piccolo off to the side and runs back up to #18.::
#18: Uh, yeah
Kuririren: Since #17 is so bad now, I bet Trunks could do it!
#17: Trunks ? A Chorus girl ?
#18: Youve GOT to be kidding!
Kuririren: Im not joking! Hes been getting lessons from some weird "Angel of Saiyans" or something like that. Hes pretty good now!
#18: All right, lets hear `em sing.
::Dende and Freiza step aside as Trunks walks down to #17, #18, and Kuririren. As he walks past, #17 grabs his butt.::
Trunks: Hey! What was that for, you gay jerk?!
#18: Well, start singing!
Trunks: (sighs) Okay, fine
Think of meeeeeeeeeeeee,
Think of me fooooooondly
When weve said goooooooodbye-
#18: Okay, you can be in the lead
::She walks away shuddering. #17 walks off angrily, and Kuririren turns to Trunks.::
Kuririren: Wow, that was cool, dude!
::Trunks, Kuririren and all the other Chorus girls walk off-stage. Trunks goes into his dressing room, to switch into his dress for the performance later that night. He pulls on a frilly pink dress and sighs.::
Trunks: WHY do they give me a dress if they know Im a GUY!?
::He pulls off his jacket, and the rest of his clothes. Just as he gets his dress on, he hears a knock at his door.::
Trunks: Oh great. THIS is gonna be embrrasing
::He opens the door and sticks his head out. Tien is standing there.::
Tien: Are you ready? The performance starts in five minutes.
Trunks: Yeah, Im ready
Tien: Brush your hair! Its messy
::He closes his door and walks over to his dresser. He pulls a brush out of a drawer and begins to brush his hair. He pulls out a bottle of gel, and rubs and handful of it in his hair. He piles it on his head neatly, and fixes his dress.::
Trunks: Oh God, this is embarrassing
::He steps out, and realizes everyone else is wearing a tuxedo.::
Trunks: Good God!
Kuririren: Hey, Trunks what the-
#17: You look great, Trunks!
::Goten, a young lawyer walks up to him thinking hes a girl.::
Goten: Hey, my pretty.
Goten: You look great.
Trunks: Oh my butt
Goten: Really, you do!
Trunks: Uh, Im a guy-
Goten: Dont be so shy, precious!
Trunks: All right, stay away from me!
::Trunks runs off with Goten chasing after him.::
Goten: Where are you going, Princess?
Kuririren: Well that was weird
Chaozu: (drunk) Were starting ugh now kiddies mghf ak hofto for thef
Tien: Eh, were starting now. Trunks, get back here! Goten, stop chasing the poor girl!
Trunks: IM A GUY!!!!!
::Trunks runs back to everyone, out of breath.::
Trunks: I (pant) think I (huff, wheeze) lost him .
Goten: Hey, hot momma!
Trunks: (slaps Goten) GET AWAY FROM ME YOU GAY FREAK!!!!!
::Goten draws back, looking worried.::
Goten: They always said I was a bit too crazy for sassy girls
Tien: Get on stage, Trunks!
::Trunks runs on stage. The curtains open, and Trunks is red as he begins to sing.::
Trunks: Think of me-----------,
Think of me fo----------ndly
When weve said go----------------------od bye------------
Baby: (starts crying)
Trunks: (mumbling) Whatever #18 hired me for this job, so Ive GOT to be good!
::The baby continues to cry.::
Trunks: We never said------------------- our love was evergree------------n,
Our as uncha----nging as the sea---,
But if you can still remember, spare a bean- thought- for meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
::Audience is silent.::
Goten: (Now in his old box seat) Wow! Shes so good! I cant believe it! Shes better than I thought! Bravo! YAHOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Trunks: Please promise me that sometimes,
::He walks offstage panting because of the long note. The audience claps absent- mindedly, and leaves for the intermission.::
Trunks: Oh GOD hat was embarrassing
::He walks into his dressing room and hears a voice.::
Vegeta: Uh bravi bravi . Bravisimmi?
Trunks: What the HFIL?
Vegeta: Dont ask.
::Kuririren walks in. He has not heard the voice.::
Kuririren: Hey, sis!
Trunks: Im a boy, amd Im not related to you
Kuririren: Whatever eh, that was pretty good! Who taught you to sing so much better than #17?
Trunks: Well, my dad told me about this "Angel of Music" or something, and hes been giving me free lessons in my sleep. Its actually pretty cool, if you ask me. I mean, free music lessons! You cant get any better than that!
Kuririren: Youre nuts! Uh, youre face is white
Trunks: It scares me
Kuririren: (holds Trunks hand) Dont be scared.
Trunks: Woah, what are you trying to do?
Kuririren: Come on, lets go talk to Goten!
(Kuririren drags Trunks into the room behind the stage. Waiting for them is Tien, Chaozu, Goten, and #18.::
Goten: Hey, babe. That performance was great.
Trunks: Im a GUY!
Goten: Ha! Thats pretty funny, chick!
::Trunks slaps Goten.::
#18: Well, it was. Poor #17, now shes just a chorus girl.
Trunks: #17s a guy, too
Tien: Nonsense! Hey, I like your dress, Trunks!
Trunks: Shut up
#18: Thats no way to treat these gentlemen!
Trunks: Oh gentlemen my BUTT!
#18: Theyre the reason that youre here performing for all the men that love you, and all the girls that want to be you!
Trunks: Once again MY BUTT!
Goten: Speaking of butt, youve got a nice one-
Trunks: SHUT UP!!!
::Trunks storms off. When he walks back in his dressing room, he sees an image of Vegeta in the mirror. He screams.::
Vegeta: Whoops uh, didnt mean to scare you all right, Im your Angel of Music, come here so you can see me laboratory.
Trunks: God no!
::Vegeta reaches out and grabs Trunks arm.::
Trunks: OW! Hey, that hurts!
Vegeta: Come on! Im your Angel! Come to me, Angel of Music!
::Vegeta pulls Trunks into the mirror and Trunks wakes up on a Capsule Corp. ship rowing across an underground lake.::
Trunks: God where am I?
Vegeta: Sing once again with me
Trunks: Ive got a recipe for stoned soup dont make me use it
Vegeta: Our strange duet
:: Trunks stands up and kicks the mask off of Vegetas face.::
Trunks: Ah ha! You are the Phantom of the Space Ship! I caught ya!
Vegeta: Night time sharpens, hightens each sensation
::Trunks kicks Vegeta in the face.::
Vegeta: Oww! All right, thats it! Prepare to die, brat!
<Dun dun >
TO BE CONTINUED
(This is the first story in a series of four simply a silly remake of Phantom of the Opera. The next one is coming soon! ^_^ )