The mass-selling-out comes to a halt
soon!
Great Saiyaman: "Our first idea
for a TV spin-off will star my dad in Thats
Myself! Itll be kind of a take on the whole
My Three Dads thing, but this time, Goku
will be the dad of himself. Get it? Ahh, the kids will
eat it up."
Chibi Goku: "Awww, but Goku,
you said that it was ok to take the space pod out for
a ride!"
Goku: "While youre living
under my roof, youll do as I say, and I say, no
space pod driving for you!"
Saiyaman: "Did I mention that
the show will have a sci-fi twist? With robots? And
lasers? And futuristic go-go girls? And ray guns? And
lasers? And the viewers can wear see-through googles?"
Barry: "Hmm...thatll make
for some excellent tie-in merchandising. Great job.
What else do you have?"
Saiyaman: "In keeping with the
ever-expanding market for teen-oriented films, I have
decided to let young Pan have her own movie. Ya know,
a movie that other young female fans can relate to.
Were working with the title, And Then Theres
the Slut."
GT Trunks: "Yo slut, come here
and do me."
Pan: "OK, I am going to do you.
I am the slut. A fat, dirty slut."
Saiyaman: "Isnt the script
writing to die for?"
Gen: "Hmmm...needs a little
more work. Add the words ho and skank
a few times, and youll be set."
Gen: "It seems as though we
have enough hot property to put on the market. Between
the sites, merchandise, and media, we should make a
killing! And then, I shall rule the kiddie porn industry!"
Barry: "Anime industry, sir,
the anime industry."
Gen: "What he said. OK crew,
we go public tomorrow. Godspeed!"
(By Monday, the sites were live.
On Wednesday, the new TV show premiered on FOX. On Friday,
the movie debuted, and on Saturday, the new products
and stores opened. Only time would tell whether or not
the new streams of revenue would be successful.)
Gen: *sigh* "Well, the numbers
are in..."
Barry: (Pops out from under the table)
"...and there isnt much to be said about
them."
Gen: "Hey you, did I tell you
to stop? Get back to work!"
Goku: "So, whats the deal?"
Gen: "You all suck! Miserably!
The movie bombed, the show was cancelled after one episode,
the sites were all hacked, and all of the products were
pulled off the market for being unsafe for kids (a kid
got strangled by a leg warmer, for gods sake!),
and all the diners were shut down for not being sanitary!
Didnt any of you guys check your work!?"
Goku: ..................."so,
who wants to get a pizza?"
Vegeta: "Im game for that."
Piccolo: "Who wants to see my
Michael Jackson impression?"
Cell: "Well, Im off to
ballet class..."
Gen: "Shit."
Barry: "See, I TOLD you we could
have saved money by hiring that non-English-speaking
Mexican guerrilla to do the voice of Goku, but NOOO,
we had to hire that puppet-man instead!"
Gen: "Just shut up. Besides,
we DID hire that librarian, just like you wanted. Now,
lets leave this all behind us, and massage each
others feet."
Barry: "Yessir."
THE END!!
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