Underfaker + Rage = Editorial!
Well, hello gang. Been along time since I talked to
yall, I know, I know...Im sorry. Anyway,
its editorial time and what has your old buddy
Jonathan got to say this time? Plenty! What am I going
to say? Hatred, rage and anger would be somewhere along
the correct lines of the tone of
this one, but hey- You should know that by now. So,
off we go!
Okay, first on the agenda is the online DBZ community
crap. Nobody really specific right now, but more like
a group of people. What has got me so mad? The most
STUPID, IDIOTIC and NON-SENSICAL usage of words EVER.
I swear to God Almighty, if I hear What the HFIL?!
again, I am going to become violent. I once read somewhere
that somebody said they werent going
to use this term anymore because The humor has
run out, due to over-usage.. No, see, IT WAS NEVER
FUNNY TO BEGIN WITH. It may have registered a half-chuckle
that lasted about a nanosecond in my brain, but then
it was gone. I swear, some people dont even have
the sense that God gave them. Speaking of God, Im
also getting sick and tired of seeing For Kamis
sake!. For those of you not in the know,
in the Japanese version of DBZ, Kami was also called
God, which makes no sense at all. I mean,
if Kami really was God, then there are some
things he could have stopped. Oh, and before you get
started, yes I do know that its all part of some
really screwed up hierarchy thing, but I dont
really care about that. In fact, if you DID know that,
then the intelligence of comparing For Kamis
sake and For Gods sake is lost.
Then we have the ever classic which involves
saying something stupid about FUNimation, while somehow
keeping the words FUN or imation.
CRAPimation, F*CKimation, FUNtokilldragonball....theres
tons of them. You know, if I ever met the people that
came up with these and I had a ball-peen hammer, you
might as well call the meat wagon. Of course, I know
people only say these things to piss me off. Oh, and
what is this that I hear about? Some webmasters are
now saying that the fun of DBZ is lost,
and then turn right around and find some way to blame
it on FUNimation. Granted, there may be some truth in
that. Who am I to say I know who so-and-so is thinking?
However, I am willing to wager that 90% of this is due
to the fact that DBZ went mainstream. Ill be the
first to admit it, when something goes mainstream it
can lose a lot of popularity. See, DBZ was something
of a cult classic. Something that only you
and a few friends new about and enjoyed alone. But when
it became popular, it wasnt just yours
anymore and therefore it doesnt look as good as
it used to. Take something like...Speed Racer. A show
released in the 60s that many adults still have
fond memories of watching. It was fun to watch because
it was a cartoon (the term anime didnt exist in
the 60s. Maybe Japanimation did...) that was geared
for children. Fast-forward to the 90s. Now, MTV
is showing Speed Racer. It wasnt shown for entertainment
value, it was shown for its ridiculousness. Something
for college students to laugh about and call camp.
Now, very few adults have fond memories of Speed Racer
always look at the past through rose-colored glasses.
It breaks my heart to say it, it really does. And then
youve got your other things...burn-out, mainstream
popularity and it all comes crashing down. Sorry to
say it, but it is true.
Switching gears a bit, lets talk about anime on Cartoon
Network. Aparently, there is going to be a new one called
The Big O. Now how did this pass the censors,
huh? For those of you who dont know, The
Big O is a phrase used in many adult cinemas (Im
talking about porno).
Quick notes- Planet Namek. We know you dont like
the dub music. WE GET IT ALREADY. No need to keep telling
us over and over. Oh, and your money problem? How about
doing a magical thing we all learned- Get a JOB! Nobody
is going to send you all the money you need/want! If
I needed money, I sure as hell wouldnt write an
editorial about it! If your site is costing you $3,000,
then for Gods sake, DROP IT! Get rid of it! I
sure as Hell wouldnt keep something around that
was costing me that much and I couldnt afford
it. Then again, youre probably a yankee and there
aint too much I can do about it.
Another thing Ive been hearing a LOT of lately
is how FUNimation has killed Dragonball and is
a capitalist pigbeast of DEATH! Im not going
to deny that. In fact, Ive been saying that since
Day One. However, dont go thinking that the Japanese
version of DB wasnt created without the idea of
making money. Dragonball was made with the SOLE intention
of making money! In fact, show me where Dragonball was
made with art in mind and I can show you where it was
made with money in mind. Why do you think that DB toys
are made? Why do you think DBGT was cancelled? What,
do you think that someone walked up to Akira Toryiama
and said, Hey! You draw pretty pictures! Would
you like it if I put them in my mangas?!
Its all about MONEY. Japan, America, England even Russia,
money is the end-all be-all of things. Sure, FUNimation
is capitalistic. But so is Toei/Bird Studios and anyone
else youd like to throw in there. You want further
proof? Hell, just go to eBay! Look up DB merchandise
and youll find dozens of auctions with taglines
of RARE! DB Japanese import lunchbox/poster/stationary/cards!
In essence, F*CK DBs supposed art. It doesnt
exist. While we are at it, F*CK ANY ANIMES supposed
art. Every anime, no matter what, is created for money.
Art, symbolism and stuff like that is a nice little
bonus to go with it. You dont like it? TOUGH.
Its the truth. But I know, someone, somewhere
will disagree with me because they refuse to throw away
the blissful ignorance that they live in. They will
continue to chant their mantra of Sub good, dub
bad, while rocking back and forth holding some
fansubs. You want to really change things up? Really
do something that influences your life or
changes it? Then stop all this nonsense and do like
I did- Think for yourself. Become a revolutionary.
And thats all I have to say about that.
The Super Texa-Jin,
Jonathan Underfaker Lindsey